So, I’ve kind of been a little bit all over the map lately. With my writing progress, my blogging, and even what book I’m currently working on. I just can’t seem to subscribe to much consistency, these past couple months. I keep thinking I finally have it all back together, only to have my newfound dedication fray, whether from lack of inspiration or life events that plant obstacles in my schedule. (I’m working a new part-time job, which is part of the upset. It’s taken a little bit of getting used to, and has required a revamping of my usual weekly schedule. I work the graveyard shift on weekends, now, which is new and different for me, but it’s a job where I have a lot of down time, so I actually have the freedom to write a bit, if I can get my drowsy brain to commit to plotting between 11:00pm and 5:00am).
Anyway; after getting stuck on my novella Lunis and not writing anything for a week or so because I was determined that it would come back to me… It hasn’t come back to me, and I would rather be writing something than nothing at all, even if it’s not something that furthers my ‘current’ project. I really don’t want to put Lunis officially on hold, which is probably what will happen if I start something new, but I did come up with a new idea for a book that’s really working for me, so I’m afraid that’s the direction I’m going. But the cover of Lunis is finished and in my gallery, so I’m committed to finishing the book sooner or later. I will, I promise.
In the meantime, I’ll be thinking about the sequels to Breathtaker, and working on my new idea, which is for a Young Adult novel entitled The Tournament of Eden. I plotted half of it over the weekend at work, and the other half today, and then sat down and wrote the first chapter. And I feel like I’ve gotten some of the magic back that I used to feel when I sat down to write a book (haven’t felt that way in awhile), so I’m sticking with this! Only a few of the books that I have published are ones that I actually felt that way about; the rest that have that magic ‘spark’ are ones that I started way back in the day and had to interrupt because of life, and now I’m afraid to return to them in fear that I’ve neglected them and grown too far apart from them to still possess their particular spark inside me. I’m afraid I won’t do them justice, anymore, unless I can find a way to return to the essence of those days and re-capture it. So, instead, I sit here just trying to come up with neat concepts and write books that are okay, that I feel are safely good and that I’m not afraid of ruining, but I’m not all that excited about. Terrible, isn’t it? What kind of aspiring writer writes all the books she’s least excited about first?
It’s true, though – ironically, I’ve so far mostly published books that were never intended as my ‘main’ or ‘first’ books. The ones intended as ‘on the side’ things always end up getting finished and published, probably because, as I just mentioned, I’m not afraid to ruin them, so I just go ahead and write them. HOW DID MY WRITING DEBUT END UP SO BACKWARDS?! It’s become clear to me that my priorities as an aspiring writer have gotten a little mixed up. (Let’s be clear, here: a few of the books I have published ARE ones I was excited about, and that I’m happy to have out there as debut material, but there are so many others that I’m completely psyched about, and have neglected in the interests of writing something I’m not afraid of ruining, that I can spew out faster).
This is why, faced with a new idea that really excites me in that old way, I have to run with it. It’s time to take back the old author in me! No more ho-hum projects; it’s time for a new Precious! (And maybe some old ones too, after this!)